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Single doesn’t mean being lonely or alone

单身并不意味着孤独或独身



As the holidays transition to the New Year, singles may face questions from friends and family: “When are you getting serious about dating?

随着假期过渡到新年,单身人士可能会面临朋友和家人的唠叨:“你什么时候开始认真对待约会啊?”

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Why more Americans are living single

为什么越来越多的美国人选择单身呢?

The truth is that more Americans are living unmarried and without a romantic partner. In 2005, the census for the first time recorded a majority of women living outside of marriage Although, of course, some unmarried women have romantic partners.

事实上,越来越多的美国人没有结婚,没有恋人。2005年的人口普查首次记录了大多数未婚女性,当然,也有一些未婚女性拥有浪漫的伴侣。

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Some women become single mothers by choice. As sociologist Arlie Hochschild has argued, marriage brings extra work for women, making it less attractive than single life for some.

一些女性选择成为单身母亲。正如社会学家阿利霍克希尔德(Arlie Hochschild)所指出的,婚姻给女性带来了额外的工作,这使得婚姻对某些人的吸引力不如单身生活。

For other people, being single is simply a relationship preference or even an orientation. For example, there are those, referred to as “asexuals” and “aromantics,” who lack interest in sexual and romantic relationships.

对其他人来说,单身仅仅是一种关系偏好,甚至是一种取向。例如,有些人被称为“无性恋者”和“非浪漫主义者”,他们对性和浪漫关系缺乏兴趣。

Who are asexuals and aromantics?

那么哪些人是“无性恋者”和“非浪漫主义者”呢?

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Angela Chen, a journalist writing a book about asexuality, reports that her asexual interview subjects suffered from a lack of information about asexuality. As they failed to develop sexual attractions during puberty - while their classmates did - they asked themselves, “Am I normal? Is something wrong with me?”

记者Angela Chen写了一本关于无性恋的书,她说她的无性恋采访对象缺乏关于无性恋的信息。当他们在青春期没有感受到性吸引力——而他们的同学却有——他们问自己,“我正常吗?还是说我有什么问题?”

But while asexuality is sometimes misunderstood as a medical disorder, there are many differences between an asexual orientation and a medical disorder causing a low sex drive. When asexuals are treated as “abnormal” by doctors or therapists, it does them a disservice.

虽然无性恋有时被误解为一种医学障碍,但无性取向和导致性欲低下的医学障碍之间有许多不同之处。当无性恋者被医生或治疗师视为“异常”时,他们就会受到伤害。

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Understanding the reasons people have for remaining single might help to handle family stresses. If you’re single, you could take unwanted questioning as a teachable moment. If you’re the friend or family member of someone who tells you they’re happily single – believe them.

了解人们保持单身的原因可能有助于处理家庭压力。如果你是单身,你可以把不想要的问题当作一个可以教的时刻。如果你的朋友或家人告诉你他们单身很幸福,相信他们。