Choosing and giving someone a gift can be hard. It could be a thank you gift, something for someone at their wedding, a parting present for someone on their last day at work or a birthday gift. To some of Chinese background, some gifts might be better than others.

选择并送人礼物可能很难。它可以是一份表示感谢的礼物，可以是祝贺某人结婚的礼物，可以是某人最后一天工作时的送别礼物，也可以是祝贺某人过生日的礼物。对于一些中国背景的人来说，送某些礼物可能比其他礼物更好。

Next month is my birthday. About a month ago, my Chinese-Malaysian parents asked me what I want for my birthday this year. That annoyed me – I don’t celebrate my birthday and don’t like attention. But I suppose they want to, and they know I’m a fussy person.

下个月我就要过生日了。大约在一个月前，我的华裔马来西亚父母问我今年生日想要得到什么礼物。这让我很恼火——我不喜欢庆祝我的生日，也不喜欢被关注。但我想他们是想这么做的，因为他们知道我是个挑剔的人。
原创翻译：龙腾网 https://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处


There is much superstition surrounding gift giving in Chinese culture. There are gifts which some believe bring the receiver good luck, and others not as much luck.

在中国文化中，送礼有很多迷信。有些人认为某些礼物能给收礼者带来好运，而另一些则不会。

In Chinese culture, gifts that are associated with events we don’t want to happen tend to be avoided. Generally, taboo gifts in Chinese culture are tied to “touch wood” circumstances and language we’d rather distance ourselves from. For example, green hats are one such gifts: “wearing a green hat” translates to unfaithful wife. Giving shoes and umbrellas are avoided as in Mandarin they refer to breaking up of a relationship or partnership.

在中国文化中，人们往往会避免送那些与我们不想发生的事情有关的礼物。一般来说，在中国文化中，禁忌的礼物与“带来不好的结果”的环境和语言有关，我们需要避免送这些礼物。例如，绿帽子就是这样的一种礼物:“戴绿帽子”意味着“妻子不忠”。也要避免赠送鞋子和雨伞，因为在普通话中，这意味着分手或伙伴关系的结束。

When I was seven, I saw a green-coloured frog clock at a stall at the shopping centre in Malaysia and loved it. My family and I walked past this stall every Saturday, and each time I begged my parents for it, and begged even more when my eighth birthday approached. On my eighth birthday, I eagerly unwrapped my present from my parents to a…pile of Enid Blyton books. In hindsight, fair enough: “giving a clock” sounds like sòng zhōng, which translates to “funeral ritual”

七岁的时候，我在马来西亚购物中心的一个摊位上看到了一个绿色的青蛙钟，我很喜欢它。我和我的家人每个星期六都会经过这个摊位，每次我都向我的父母乞求能够得到它，当我八岁生日临近时，我更想得到它了。而在我八岁生日那天，我急切地打开父母给我的礼物，却看到一堆伊妮德.布莱顿的书。事后看来，我的父母是有道理的:因为“送钟”听起来像送终，翻译过来就是“葬礼仪式”。

For the typical Chinese person, gifts offering one positive sensory experiences are good gifts. Things that are good for the mind, body and soul make good gifts. Peaches, nuts and tea are known to have health benefits and considered prosperous presents. It’s probably why my mum comes round to cook vermicelli or claypot noodles on my birthday – not only are they healthy but they symbolise longetivity too.

对于典型的中国人来说，能带来积极感官体验的礼物才是好礼物。对身心和灵魂有益的东西都是好的礼物。众所周知，桃子、坚果和茶对健康有益，被认为是吉祥的礼物。这可能就是为什么我妈妈在我生日的时候会做细面或煲仔面——它们不仅健康，还象征着长寿。

It’s no surprise then good gifts in Chinese culture are tied with traditional customs and old-school trains of thought. Gifts that come in pairs or even sets – except in sets of 4 as the number four sounds like death in Mandarin – are popular, auspicious. Even better if the gifts are new as some Chinese reckon bad luck from the previous owner may be attached to second-hand items.

在中国文化中，好的礼物是与传统习俗和老派思想联系在一起的，这并不足为奇。成双甚至成套的礼物——除了一套四件，因为数字“4”在普通话里听起来像“死”——很受欢迎，也很吉利。如果礼物是新的就更好了，因为一些中国人认为送旧的礼物可能会给原主人带来厄运。

Practical gifts are favoured as well. Money sealed in red packets is a common gift at weddings and on birthdays. Same goes for porcelain cutlery and crockery with intricate patterns, especially the floral kind. Now that I am older, my parents present me with a red packet when my birthday comes round – and tell me to put all the money in it in the bank.

实用的礼物也很受欢迎。装在红包里的钱是在婚礼仪式和生日宴会上常见的礼物。同样的道理也适用于带有复杂图案的陶瓷餐具和陶器，尤其是带有花卉图案的。现在我长大了，我的父母在我每次过生日的时候都会给我一个红包，并告诉我把所有的钱都存在银行里。

On occasions, the more extravagant and expensive the gift, the more the gift giver might impress. But an overly lavish gift given to colleagues in China can be considered bribery, apart from letting one flaunt their wealth and giving them “face” in the world of business.

有时候，礼物越奢侈、越昂贵，送礼者给人的印象就越深刻。但在中国，给同事送过于奢侈的礼物，除了让人感到你在炫耀自己的财富、让你在商界有“面子”之外，还可能被视为贿赂。

My Chinese-Malaysian parents always taught me to use both hands to give and receive gifts; it’s a mark of respect. Some of us hesitate opening presents upon being handed them. No surprise since Asians can be reserved about expressing emotion, and traditionally in China people like to open gifts in private though this is changing.

我的华裔马来西亚父母总是教我用双手送礼物和收礼物;这是一种尊重。我们中的一些人在收到礼物时会犹豫是否立刻把它打开。这并不奇怪，因为亚洲人在表达情感方面可能会有所保留，而在中国，传统上人们喜欢在私下里打开礼物，尽管这种情况正在发生改变。

There’s more to meets the eye when one hands over a gift. As French tragedian Pierre Corneille said on giving:

当一个人送出一份礼物时，会让人看到更多的东西。正如法国悲剧作家皮埃尔.高乃依在谈论“给予“这个话题时所说:

“The manner of giving is worth more than the gift.”

“送礼的方式比礼物本身更重要。”

When we give someone a gift, we usually want them to like it or at the very least find some use for it. For the thoughtful among us, we want a gift to be meaningful and if it’s a truly meaningful gift, chances are it will be synonymous with the other person’s culture, beliefs and values. And for those of us receiving the gift, we’ll know it. On being thoughtful, author Wes Adamson said:

当我们给别人礼物时，我们通常希望他们喜欢它，或者至少找到它的一些用处。对于考虑周全的人来说，他们希望他们送的礼物是有意义的，如果这是一份真正有意义的礼物，那么它很可能与对方的文化、信仰和价值观是一致的。对于我们这些收到礼物的人来说，我们会感受到对方的用心。关于考虑周全，作家韦斯.亚当森曾说过:

“The simple gift of giving becomes an elaborate rich aftertaste of a natural blissful feeling, lingering endlessly in my lifetime.”

“简单的馈赠变成了一种自然幸福的精致回味，在我的一生中挥之不去。”

A gift is more than a material obxt. Behind each gift given is a person thinking of you, coupled with memories spent with each other. When it comes to gift giving, whether we’re giving or receiving a gift, it’s the thought that counts and that’s what we remember.

礼物不仅仅是一件实物。每一份礼物的背后都是一个人对你的思念，再加上与对方共度的回忆。说到送礼物，无论我们是送礼物的还是收礼物的，心意才是最重要的，这就是我们应该记住的。

Do you find it hard to pick a gift for someone?

你觉得给别人挑礼物很难吗?