哪些秘密如果被人知道就会毁掉你的一生？
What secret could ruin your life if it got out?
译文简介
——你能保密吗？
能。
——我也能。
正文翻译
What secret could ruin your life if it got out?
哪些秘密如果被人知道就会毁掉你的一生？
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To pass my high-school graduation writing exam, I just wrote the story to Gears Of War because I didn’t study or prepare beforehand
为了通过我的高中毕业写作考试，我把战争机器（译注：电子游戏）的故事写进去了，因为我之前没有好好准备
Lol pretty solid story though
哈哈哈他那个故事倒是不错
If you were able to convey the story on paper well enough without any errors, that's probably all they cared about mostly.
如果你已经有能力把那个故事很好地写到纸面上，没有任何错误的话就没问题，毕竟他们可能在乎的也就是这一点了。
Imagine how many people are typing their secrets just to completely erase on the last sentence and not post at all
想象一下有多少人在这个页面上已经写下了自己的秘密，结果写到最后一句就全部删掉了，根本没有发不出来。
When my sister was going through an alcoholic mental health crisis she decided to tell our family and friends all of my secrets. I was trying to convince her to get help, she resented me for it and felt exposing me would take the heat off of her.
我妹妹在经历由酗酒导致的精神危机的时候，决定把我的所有秘密都告诉我的家人和朋友们。我本来在劝她去寻求帮助，但是她因此而痛恨我，并且觉得如果把我的料都爆出来，她身上的注意力就能转移给我。
我这一辈子都充满了罪恶和值得后悔的事情，如果我可以穿越时光回去的话，我希望自己能改变。我没做过违法的事情，但是有些人觉得我做过的事情不道德。那都是一些非常私人的事情，我从来都没想过分享。
但是现在所有人都知道了！我陷入了一个两难的境地，于是我不得不与我的家人进行我从没打算过的对话。我举行了一次开放的对话，回答了所有的问题。结果根本没人在乎我做过的这些事。她搬起石头砸了自己的脚。
事实上，我得到了家人的爱与支持，而她则彻底被我的绝大多数家人视而不见了。他们都认为她的行为是自我标榜的正义，是令人愤慨的。
这些事情都被抖出来没有毁了我，反而解放了我。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
That I was a heroin addict in my 20s. Been clean 9 years, and no one I work with, or associate with at this point in my life (besides wife, kids, and immediate family) realize that 10 years ago I was an unrecognizable shell of who I am now…
我20多岁的时候其实是个海洛因的瘾君子。现在我已经戒了9年，我的同事，或者现在这个时间点认识我的人里（除了我的老婆，孩子和近亲之外）没有一个人知道10年前我还是一个根本认不出的形骸……
im currently struggling with addiction not as serious as a heroin addiction but its majorly impacted my life and left me a shadow of my former self. sometimes it feels like ill never get to the point of having a family, good job or friends again but reading that makes me want to keep trying to get clean and live the life i should be living.
我现在正在与成瘾性的东西作斗争，虽然没有海洛因成瘾那么严重，但也严重地影响了我的生活，让我生活在从前的我的阴影之中。有时候我感觉我可能永远都不会成家立业，有一份好的工作，再找到朋友，但是你的留言让我希望继续努力戒毒，去过我应该过的生活。
Bro you will. I sit here 5+ years off fentanyl, married, dog, cat, apartment, and now pregnant with my first baby. When six years ago I was in jail 50k bail, 3 felonies and 4 misdemeanors.
你一定做得到的兄弟。我已经戒了芬太尼五年多了，已婚，有猫有狗有公寓，现在怀着我的第一个孩子。六年前我还蹲在监狱里，保释五万，犯了三个重罪和四个轻罪。
你比起那个狗日的毒药跟你说的要更有价值，你根本不需要那种东西！！！我不管那东西究竟是什么，哥们要是它已经在影响你和你的生命了，那就已经变得太严重了。
I’m mixed up in the fast food game. Sometimes I tell the homeless people around the corner what time we throw out the expired burgers, so they can grab them from the trash. It’s explicitly banned in our code of ethics that we sign when we start.
我现在在快餐行业工作。有时候我会跟附近的无家可归的人说，我们什么时候会扔掉过期的汉堡，让他们从垃圾桶里拿出来吃。我们刚入行时签的职业道德准则里，是明确禁止这种行为的。
That’s a good thing that you are doing. Bro fuck that code of ethics. It’s more ethical to give food to the homeless than to throw it away.
你这么做是非常好的。去他妈的职业道德准则吧兄弟，把能吃的东西给无家可归者，比扔掉要道德多了。
Imagine banning feeding the homeless and then calling it the code of "ethics"
禁止给无家可归的人吃东西，还说这是“道德”，可真有意思。
This question always makes me wonder about the horrible secrets that people can't bring themselves to talk about, even in a semi-anonymous place like reddit. The people here who have spoken up already have pretty intense secrets. Just imagine the secrets that go unshared.
这个问题总是会让我想，到底有多少可怕的秘密是人们根本不敢让自己说出来的，就算是在reddit这种半匿名的地方。这里决定把秘密分享出来的人，他们的秘密已经够猛的了。想象一下那些没有说出来的吧。
A cousin of mine tried to rape me when I was young and years later I tried to drown him with a hose (I put the hose at maximum in his throat) but when I heard my parents coming I stopped, after that I said to him: if you tell anyone about this Im going to really kill you, but we didn't saw each other after that because his family moved to another state
我有一个表亲在我小时候曾经试过强奸我，几年之后我试过用一根水管把他淹死（我把水扭到最大然后勒到了他的脖子上），但是听到我家里人过来之后我就停手了，然后我跟他说，如果你跟别人说起这件事我可就真的要把你给杀了，但我们此后就再也没见过，因为他们家搬到另一个州了。
I used to masturbate in the school bathroom when I was in 8th grade
我八年级的时候曾经在学校洗手间里撸过
I had one of the most intense orgasms of my life in my university library toilet after nearly losing it reading some mildly erotic story online.
我这辈子最猛烈的一次高潮是在网上看了一个稍微有点擦边的故事之后，在大学图书馆的洗手间里把持不住冲的一发。
When I was 11 I was told to take out the trash and I did but (for context my family had a grill with a box of matches next to it and it was fall) but I burned some dead leaves for like 2 minutes then I stomped on them to put out the fire but all did was push it right next to our house and then the house went up the flames and my parents had very well paying jobs so they were able to pay for the damages but when the authorities came and firefighters put out the fire, they were wondering how it started and the authorities suspected someone jumped to the fence and lit up the leaves to burn our house down. Our parents scared for my life moved somewhere else and they lost the jobs and lost a lot of money moving to our new house and for the next solid 7 years we lived like shit. and my parents still do not know that I'm the reason they have to look like that.
11岁的时候爸妈让我把垃圾扔掉，我去扔了，但是（提前说一下，我家院里有个烧烤架和一盒火柴，当时是秋天）我烧了大概两分钟的落叶，然后我踩了几脚，想要把火灭掉，但却把火扇到了我们家房子上，于是我们家房子就起火了。我的父母工作都非常不错，所以他们能担负起损失，但是政府的人过来，消防员把火给灭掉之后，他们都想不通到底这场火是怎么烧起来的，政府的人怀疑是不是有人跳过围栏把落叶给点燃了，然后把房子烧掉了。我爸我妈担心我的生命安全，就搬到了别的地方，工作也没了，因为搬家花了一大笔钱，之后整整七年我们家过的生活都特别烂，但直到今天我爸妈还不知道我自己才是他们过成那个样子的原因。
One time in elementary school, there was this really big important test… I was out sick that day, as were a handful of other kids (flu season). There were like 6 of us total who had to make up the test, we were put in a separate room and told to be quiet and focus on our tests, our teacher would be checking on us very soon. A few minutes after she left, a voice calls out “… does anyone know the answer to number 7?”
小学的时候，有这么一个非常重要的大型考试……我那天生病了，其他几个也是（流感高发季）。当时我们一共有6个孩子需要补考，我们被安排到单独一个房间，有人跟我们说要安静，专注于考试，我们的老师会马上过来看。她走之后过了几分钟，有个声音说，“……有人知道第七题的答案吗？”
很快，我们就派一个孩子去看着门口，剩下的人互相讨论出问题的答案。我记得老师来看过一次，但当时我们基本上已经全都把题做完了。
我们的成绩都是A和B。
我知道这不算是什么毁掉一辈子的秘密，但我已经瞒了快二十年了
I love it when an overbearing authority figure accidentally teaches you teamwork and trust
专横的管理者不小心教会了你们团队合作和互相信任，太有意思了
The real test all along
这才是真正的测验
I draw furry porn and make great money off of it. I have a normal job but I use the art money for things I want like expensive clothes
我画福瑞的色图，并且挣好多钱。我有份正经工作，但是我会用画画挣的那笔钱买点我喜欢的东西，比如昂贵的衣服。
I often think of suicide. I have two kids and they’re the only reasons I am here.
我经常想自杀。我有两个孩子，他们是我留在这里的唯一理由。
Your kids love and need you, but you have worth beyond being a parent.
你家孩子都喜欢你，并且需要你，但是你的价值不止于当他们的家长。
Thank you. I’m going to try and find myself again this year.
谢谢你。我今年决定再试一次，看能不能找到我自己。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Not a secret but if a list of every intrusive thought I've ever had comes out im screwed
虽然不算是什么秘密，但如果我把脑子里忽然出现的那些侵入性想法都让别人知道的话，我就完犊子了。
You and everyone else
不止你，所有人都是。
For a brief moment I felt this sense of relief in that I might just be normal.
有那么一刹那，我忽然感觉可能我只不过是个正常人。
Oh you are way more normal than you think
噢你可比你所以为的要正常多了。
Today I was cutting up some snacks in the kitchen during the football game with my family and my in-laws over.
今天我在厨房切点小零食给家里人吃，我岳父正好过来看。
我打开抽屉，拿一把很锋利的厨刀的时候忽然想，“要是我拿着这把刀走过去捅我岳父的脖子会怎么样”
更怪的是我真的很喜欢我岳父。
As long as you continue to categorize these as “fucked up intrusive thoughts” and not “ideas/goals”, I think you’re fine.
只要你仍然可以把这些想法分类为“丧心病狂的侵入性思绪”而不是“理想/目标”，我觉得你就没问题。
Saw a therapist say this -
有个心理医生说过这么句话：
我们都会有疯狂的想法。你是控制不了自己的想法的。想法来了又走。你能做的是管好你自己对于这些想法的行为，以及是否要采取行动。就算这些想法让你觉得自己有可能要真的这么做，从而让你感到害怕，只要你还在感到害怕，那么这就很可能是一件好事，是一件健康的事。
如果你还没有因为这些侵入性的想法而真的动手做什么事，那么你可能就可以继续这样下去。这种想法比你想象的要普遍多了！
I skipped my brothers wedding. Told him I had strep throat. I just hated his now wife. Cunt.
我翘了我哥的婚礼。说我喉咙感染了。其实我就是烦他现在这个老婆。贱货。
Poetry.
这是首诗啊。
He probably knows.
他很可能知道。
He knows for sure.
他肯定知道。
One time I accidentally stole a pack of balloons from Walmart. I put it in my pocket & was gonna take it out to pay for it but I forgot & walked out with it
有一次我不小心从沃尔玛偷了一袋气球。我把气球放到口袋里，本来想拿出来付款的，但是我给忘了，于是就揣着气球走出去了。
I accidentally stole a bag of shredded cheese. I was 7 or 8 months pregnant and had my 2 year old with me. He was sitting in the seat part of the shopping cart. I gave him the bag of cheese to play with and didn't realize he ended up sitting on it somehow. As I was loading my groceries and putting him into his car seat, I saw the contraband. Considered going back into the store to pay for it for about 2 seconds and then realized that I was completely ok with being a criminal. Way too tired at that point to walk back into the store. Sixteen years later I'm still sleeping well at night.
我曾经不小心偷过一包奶酪碎。我当时怀孕七八个月，带着两岁的大儿子。他正坐在购物车的儿童座上。我把那包奶酪碎给他玩，结果他忘了自己最后坐在上面了。直到我把买的东西往车里放，把他抱到车上的时候，我才看见我走私来的货。本来打算拿着奶酪回去把钱付了，但是两秒钟之后发现自己当这个罪犯也完全没有任何问题。当时已经太累了，根本不想走回店里去。十六年之后我晚上仍然睡得很踏实。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
编辑补充：看来我们要么都是一群罪犯，要么都在养一群小罪犯啊。带着小的去逛超市的这些故事都很棒，我这下总算明白为什么我小时候妈妈从来不带我们去商店了。我们家七个孩子，所以逛超市是她唯一独处的时光。
而且，如果你想偷点东西的话，看来小孩儿是完美的共犯！
i accidentally stole a sandwich from the airport. i was in line with one of those cold wrapped ones from the refrigerated section and suddenly it dawned on me that i left my suitcase in the bathroom i'd just come from. frantic, i ran back to the bathroom to grab it. it was still there and i recovered it without issue, but once i calmed down i realized i was still holding the sandwich i'd been in line to pay for. i went back to explain my situation and pay for it, but they'd already closed up for the night. so i just sat down somewhere to eat it and nothing bad ever came of it.
我在机场不小心偷了个三明治。当时我在排队给自己手里从冷藏区拿的三明治结账，然后我突然意识到自己把行李箱落在来时的洗手间里了。我火急火燎地跑回洗手间去拿，行李箱还在那，然后我才想起来自己还拿着那个等着结账的三明治呢。我回去揭示了一下自己的情况，想要付款，但是他们已经关门了。于是我就找了个地方把三明治给吃了，之后也没发生什么糟糕的事。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I've been making 3D NSFW content for years and during peak pandemic it became my main income. Now it's both my wife's and my full time job.
我几年来一直在做3D的色情资源，在疫情的高峰期它成为了我的主要收入来源。现在我和我老婆都在全职做这个工作。
我为自己的工作感到自豪，但如果说出去的话可能我们与家庭和朋友之间的关系就毁了。
Me and my wife make porn and watch them together. Then make more porn.
我跟我老婆会拍片儿，然后一起看，然后就能拍出更多的片儿。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
When I was 11, a friend of mine tried to steal a candy bar from a store and we got caught. We were told that we were banned for life. I went back in 40 years later and walked around like a boss.
我11岁的时候，有个朋友想要从一家商店里偷走一块巧克力棒，我俩都被抓住了。商店跟我们说终生禁止踏入这个商店。40年后我回去了，在里面像个老板一样走来走去。
My brother was banned from a big time tourist store in our city for stealing some little trinket when he was like 12. They banned him for life and took his picture with a Polaroid and put it in their book of banned customers. He finally went back like 25 years later with his kids and said something to the person working. They went into the back and brought out an album that still had his picture in it, he took a picture and texted me immediately. Everyone had a big laugh
我兄弟12岁左右的时候，因为偷了什么小玩意儿而被我们城市里的一座规模很大的旅游商店给禁入了。他们让他终生不得进入，用宝丽来给他拍了张照片，然后放到了他们的禁入消费者名册里。25年之后他带着孩子们回去了，跟那里的工作人员说了两句话。他们回到后台，拿出了那个名册，里面还有他的那张照片，他拍了张照立刻就发给了我。每个人都笑得很开心。
I nearly shit my pants in a Walmart but didn’t quite make it. It landed in front of the toilet as I squatted midair. I ended up getting some on my pants and shoes. An employee walked in mid-shit and commented that the smell was the worst they ever smelled and swore when he saw the shit droplets on the ground. I cleaned up as best as I could, but instead of leaving immediately, I kept on shopping.
我有一次在沃尔玛差点拉裤兜子，而且并不能算是没拉裤兜子。屎是在我半空中往下蹲的时候喷出来的，落在了坑前面。我的裤子上和鞋子上溅上了一点。有个商场雇员在我拉屎的时候走了进来，说那是他这辈子闻过的最难闻的味道，而当他看见地上的屎汤的时候他直接就骂人了。我尽力把地面打扫干净了，但是我并没有立刻离开，而是接着去买东西了。
I kept on shopping
引用：我接着去买东西了
既然你已经成功地标记了你的领地，这是完全可以理解的行为。事实上，你要是不在周围转转反倒还挺怪的……
I almost shit my pants in my car once. I pulled over on the highway so I could run into the woods, but a cop pulled up behind me so I couldn’t run out. He came up and asked me what the problem was so I yelled at him “I have IBS and I’m about to shit my pants!” He told me to follow him, ran back to his car, turned on his siren and gave me a high speed police escort to the nearest gas station. I’m sure he had a laugh with his buddies later, but that cop helped me that day.
我差点在车里拉裤兜子。把车停到高速旁边打算进树林里拉一泡，但是有个警察停在了我前面，所以我不能跑下车。他过来问我出什么事了，于是我对他大喊“我有肠应激综合征，马上就要拉裤子了！”他跟我说跟着他开，跑回自己的车里，打开警笛，然后把我一路高速护航到了最近的加油站。我敢说他后来肯定跟他的兄弟们乐得不行，但那个警察那天帮了我个忙。
I am a truck driver. One time I had to shit super bad… drank so much the night before. Pulled into a Walmart parking lot, shit my pants in the truck. Waddled my way into Walmart with liquid shit running down my legs. Went to men’s apparel, grabbed a pair of pants. Took said pants into the restroom, clean up my legs and ass, left my shit stained underwear and pants in the stall, then walked out of the Walmart with stolen pants.
我是个卡车司机。有一次我特别想拉屎……前一天晚上喝太多了。停到了一个沃尔玛的停车场，然后在卡车里拉裤子了。我像只鸭子似的往沃尔玛里走，屎汤还在顺着大腿往下淌。走到男装区，拿了条裤子。把裤子带到厕所里，把全是屎的裤子和内裤留在更衣间里，然后带着偷来的裤子走出了沃尔玛。
可能是我这辈子干过的最糟糕的一件事……
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
I'm only working half of the time at work.
我只有一半的时间在工作。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
我成功地制造了一种假象，让我看起来好像在全身心地投入到自己被分配的任务上，但实际上只需要花一半的时间。有时候压力会变得比较大，但绝大多数时候我可以把所有事情都分配好，好让我可以在办公室干除了我的工作之外的的所有东西。居家办公的时候我基本上只玩电子游戏。
如果有人问我现在怎么样，我就会撒个谎，搞得好像我已经完全被工作，日程表和截止日期弄得晕头转向了。我很擅长这么做，可能我现在可以在任何事情上撒个谎，绝大多数人都会信。
如果我的同事或者老板发现我每星期只工作大概二十个小时却拿全职工作的薪酬，我可能会立刻就被炒鱿鱼。而且我还生活在一个小城市里，所以我的声誉也可能会被毁掉，导致我拿不到找工资。
我已经这么干了两年了……
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
编辑：行吧，在得到一些共鸣之后我发现我可能在老板的眼里是个坏人，但你们很多人也是。别忘了，要怪就怪体制，不要怪里面的参与者，好吧？
第二次编辑：只是想澄清一下，我根本不对我的行为感到难过。我拿的这点薪水根本就不够让我主动要求排满40小时的工作的。
I'm a software engineer and I do the same, they simply don't expect us to work like robots, you have your tasks and time for it, do it good and don't be late with them and you'll be fine.
我是个软件工程师，我也会做同样的事情，他们根本也没打算拿我们当机器人一样使唤，你只是接到了任务和完成任务的时间，好好完成，不要拖延，你就没事。
但是最近我在reddit上看到了一个帖子，楼主他知道如何编程，于是他把自己的全部工作都自动化了，他写的软件棒到他需要故意搞一点失误出来。于是他“面临着很大的工作压力”，别人都不会过来烦他……但这哥们一星期只用工作一个小时。他说如果他告诉公司自己写了这个软件的话，他也只不过会被上司拍拍后背，说一声“干得好”，然后被分配一大堆相关的工作，所以他换了个思路。