老哥在动物园当志愿者，发现猩猩爱看猩球崛起
Anon goes to the zoo
译文简介
> 我在动物园当志愿者
> 跟那儿管动物的聊天
> 提到冬天猩猩在室内待着的时候，他们给猩猩放电影。
正文翻译
> 我在动物园当志愿者
> 跟那儿管动物的聊天
> 提到冬天猩猩在室内待着的时候，他们给猩猩放电影。
> 发现他们喜欢看猩球崛起
> 还发现有个猩猩在制作武器
我是不是应该担心？
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There are some scientists who say that chimps are now entering the Stone Age. Pull that up Jamie- pull up ‟chimp learns how to bowfish”
不是有科学家说大猩猩现在要进入石器时代了吗。对对对就是那个——搜一下“猩猩学会怎么射鱼”。
Iirc Orangutans learnt to spearfish from watching humans. We're going to be responsible for our own downfall.
假如我没记错的话，黄毛猩猩已经看人学会了用鱼叉叉鱼了。我们终究要为自己的覆灭负责。
its not too late. join r/ape so you can be chosen to live peacefully in human inclosures when the ape overlords take over.
暂时还不晚。加入“猿猴”版，你就可以在猿猴霸主占领地球之后成为被选中的议员，在人类保护区里安心居住。
So youre saying humans should rape chimps to join them? Based
所以你想说的是人类为了加入猩猩，应该干猩猩？牛逼。（译注：猿猴版的版名r/ape去掉斜杠连起来是另一个意思）
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Stockholm syndrome their asses
让猩猩屁股得斯德哥尔摩综合征。
As long as I have internet access I would be fine with living in an enclosure. All hail our ape overlords.
只要我有互联网，就算一辈子住在保护区里也没关系。猿猴霸主万岁!
God same tbh
说实话我也是
Yeah but then you have those sympathizers in the beginning that could have easily stopped the whole movement.
没错，但是你总是能碰见那些本来能在一开始就遏制整个计划，却对他们抱有同情的人。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
这帮给猴子舔屁股的人类。
Reject humanity, become monke
我不做人啦！我要成为猴儿！
My friend jokes that we should just send Orangutans to live in Florida; they will either mimic the antics of Florida Man or become more productive members of society than Florida Man
我朋友跟我开玩笑说我们应该把黄毛猩猩送到佛罗里达；他们要么会模仿佛罗里达人滑稽的行为，要么会成为比佛罗里达人还有生产力的社会成员。
It's actually sad how they are really good at copying humans but they either don't teach others, or the others don't copy them, I can't remember which. But it isn't something that they'll spread and continue.
看到他们在模仿人类方面非常擅长，却要么不教会别的个体，要么不模仿别的个体，我记不太清了，这种情况其实有点令人难过。但这种现象是不会被他们扩散、延续下去的。
Orangutans are notorious for copying each other. They’re pretty skilled at basic (for apes) tool use.
黄毛猩猩互相学习是很有名的。他们在基础（对猿猴来说）工具的使用上很擅长。
They're super good at teaching and copying, the mimicry and similarities in social structure is one of the biggest reasons to believe humans evolved from apes. The limiting factor is a lack of globalism and another power that limits their independent achievements (humans). Along with the long arms and short legs making throwing more difficult, meaning hunting is a lot harder for them, making it harder for them to reasonably evolve to have bigger and more capable brains (brains take a lot of food to fuel). Theoretically given long enough and a good enough consistent supply of food, monkeys could become almost equal to humans, but that would take like a super long fucking time. There's also the fact that their hands aren't as fine tuned as the human hand, and as said before the long arms and short legs, feet or otherwise, so tool use is just harder for them in general
他们非常擅长教学和学习，这种模仿行为和社会结构的类似是相信人类从猿猴进化而来的最主要原因之一。限制他们的因素是全球化的缺乏，以及有另一个强权（人类）会限制他们独立的成就。还有长臂和短腿会让投掷更加困难，因此捕猎对他们来说要更难，他们也因此更难以合理地获得更大、更有能力的大脑（大脑需要大量的食物来供给能量）。理论上来讲只要有足够长的时间和足够多的食物，猴子是有可能变得几乎和人类一样的，但这会花费非常久的一段时间。并且他们的手也不像人类的这样灵活，并且和我之前说的一样，他们的胳膊太长，而腿太短，所以对于他们来说使用工具总地来说要更困难。
I think what a lot of people miss as well is that we talk about evolution in the past like it happened quickly, but it happens much slower than our lifespan would allow us to observe as a whole, they’re absolutely evolving through generations it just takes hundreds of years for the smallest changes to be observed
我认为很多人忘记的一点是我们聊起过去的进化的时候总是说的好像发生得很快一样，但我们一生所能见证的进化实际上微不可察，他们是要一代一代地进化的，就算是最小的改编也要花成百上千年才能被观察到。
Speed of evolution is dependent on how often a species multiplies. Genetic mutations are introduced into the gene pool via random mutations and copying errors, most of which happen during reproduction. So if a species multiplies quickly, like with the case of some microorganisms, you can see it evolve sometimes in a matter of days. It can sometimes only take a few hundred generations for it to evolve new traits and for those traits to become prent.
进化的速度取决于一个物种繁衍的频率。基因的突变是通过随机发生的突变和基因复制时的错误这两种方式引入基因池的，而这些方式很多都发生在繁殖的时候。所以假如某个物种繁殖得很快，比如某些微生物那样，你就能看见他们几天之内就能进化。有时只需要几百代，这些物种就能进化出新的特征，并且让这些特征处于主导数量。
甚至某些大一点的动物也可以在人类一生的时间跨度里大幅度地进化。拿伦敦地铁里的蚊子来举例子吧。他们本来是普通的蚊子，但是在伦敦地铁里呆久了之后，他们成为了新的蚊子物种。
世界上有很多这种人类的基础设施和活动在相对短的时间内对某个物种的进化造成了显著冲击的例子。有种鸟，我记不清叫什么，也记不清在哪了，但我读过这种本来在悬崖上筑巢的鸟现在开始在桥梁上筑巢了，而且他们进化出了更小的翼展，让他们变得更加敏捷，从而在躲避车辆时比起他们长翅膀的亲戚要更成功。
编辑：一个令人难过的副作用，新冠病毒现在已经进化出了不同的分支，因为病毒感染了如此多的国家，并且复制了太多次。它感染的人越多，复制的次数越多，突变的概率越大，产生的新毒株就越多。
Such that we can observe evolution in Situ in something like fruit flies, but in something like elephants it’s an extremely different time scale.
所以我们可以在同一个地方观察到果蝇之类物种的进化，但像大象这种生物的时间跨度就完全不同了。
Yeah it’ll take tens of thousands of years to even slightly change their stone tools, not to mention that they haven’t even started with chipping stones to specialize the tools. Even if they were evolving we wouldn’t know it until it was practically over
没错，就算是稍稍改变他们的石质工具都要花成千上万年的时间，更不用说他们还没开始用石头制作特殊的工具。就算他们已经开始进化了，我们也不会意识到，直到他们事实上进化完成。
Exactly, like we haven’t even been studying them for that long, maybe a couple generations, any significant change takes thousands of years, unfortunately they probably don’t have that much time
完全没错，我们甚至研究他们的时间也不够长，或许我们只研究了两三代，而任何显著的变化都要花上千年，不幸的是他们很可能活不了那么久了。
I wouldn’t go so far to say they’ll soon go extinct, deforestation is a problem definitely but people are definitely becoming more attentive to it, and climate change is a problem that could be easily dealt with by just leaning more into nuclear energy and making natural resources more efficient, so in doubt that apes in general are going to go extinct. Maybe orangutans, unfortunately
我倒是不敢假设他们马上就要灭绝，森林的不断消失确实是个问题，但人类正在对此变得越来越注意，并且只要我们多用一些核电，让自然资源的使用更有效率，那么气候变化是一个十分容易解决的问题。所以我怀疑猿猴会不会灭绝。但黄毛猩猩或许会不幸灭绝。
The dexterity is definitely not at the same level, and the rate at which they learn and perfect skills like using basic tools to the point where it's useful isn't anywhere near what humans are, but it's a fascinating glimpse at what we used to be a very long time ago. The ability to give specific instruction vocally also speeds the process a lot for us, but even just watching and mimicking, we're at a whole different level.
手的灵巧程度绝对不在同一个级别。并且他们之中能学习并完善使用工具等技能到有用的程度的数量比起人类来少之又少，但我们可以向很久很久以前我们的样子投去惊鸿一瞥。能够用声音给出具体的指示同样让我们进化的进程加快了很多，但就算是观察和模仿，也让我们上升到了完全不同的层次。
Yeah compared to humans they’re really shit at most stuff necessary for developing into an apex species, with a lack of dexterity, brain power, language, etc., my point wasn’t to act as though they’re developing super fast or anything just to comment that they’re actually quite good socially and have pretty advanced social hierarchies and mimicry (for the animal kingdom obviously), in stark contrast with the earlier claim that they just don’t teach or learn
没错，比起人类来说他们想要进化成顶尖的物种还缺了太多必要的东西，他们缺乏双手的灵巧、缺乏大脑容量、缺乏语言，等等。我倒不是想说他们进化的超级快或者怎么样，只是想评论一下他们确实在社交上很不错，并且显然拥有高级的社会组织和模仿能力（当然是对于动物而言），和前面他们不学习也不教导的说法相对比。
They absolutely do copy each other and spread information it just takes longer to evolve than our lifespan allows us to observe
他们绝对是会互相学并且把信息扩散出去的，只不过进化的时间跨度比起我们一辈子能见证的要长。
Let’s teach them about hentai and video games. That will keep them from rising much further.
让我们教教他们什么是里番和电子游戏吧，这样会让他们远离进化的。
We're going to be responsible for our own downfall.
引用：“我们终将对自己的倾覆负责。”
这倒是真的，无论发不发生猴儿的起义。
If the apes are always learning from us, they’ll never be able to surpass us
假如猿猴们永远都是学习我们，那么他们就永远都不会超越我们。
One group has been making spears to hunt with for a few decades now. Bows are a matter of time and then Africa is fucked.
有一个群体已经几十年都在制作矛来打猎了。造出弓来是早晚的是，然后非洲就完犊子了。
Implying it is not already fucked.
说得好像现在还没完犊子一样。
More fucked* then. At least they don't have to worry about long range chimps yet
那就更完犊子了。至少他们现在还不需要对付远程猩猩。
Call me when they develop a written language.
等他们搞出书面语言的时候记得叫我。
Chimps just entered the stone age, we had been in the stone age for 2 million years. We have polluted the planet, and have destroyed the the habitats of the apes. They're all endangered. Poor guys will never get the chance to take over
猩猩刚进入石器时代，我们进入石器时代以来已有两百万年了。我们污染了星球，并且毁了它们的聚集地。他们已经全都濒危了。这帮可怜的家伙永远都不会有取代我们的机会了。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Maybe we could help them a bit? Plant a rifle in their food, or a nuclear bomb under their bed
或许我们能帮他们一点忙？往他们的食物里放一支步枪，或者在他们床底下放个核弹。
Many colonies of apes and monkeys have entered the stone age. Wild capuchin monkeys have been using stone tools since Rome was a superpower. And chimps in Africa were using them for 1,000 years before even a capuchins caught on.
很多猩猩和猴子的族群都进入石器时代了。野生的卷尾猴在罗马还是超级大国的时候就已经会用石质工具了。而非洲的大猩猩甚至在卷尾猴学会之前的1000年就会用了。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
There was full ass chimpanzee war in the 1970s between 2 competing tribes of chimps. One tribe even sextively picked off each of the other tribe’s male members one at a time
上世纪70年代曾经有过这么一场大猩猩全面战争。一个部落甚至把另一个部落里的雄性成员挨个杀死了。
Bullshit. A lot of animals use rocks to do shit, they won't be in the stone age until they start making tools.
扯淡。很多动物都用石头来干活，除非他们开始用石头制作工具，否则他们才不算进入石器时代。
They've been using rocks to smash nuts for millions of years. They aren't actively evolving before our eyes, they're just being recorded better.
他们用石头来打碎坚果壳已经有了几百万年了。他们当然没有在我们的眼前飞快进化，只是我们记录得更好的而已。
然而，假如我们等个几十万年，那么我们或许会看见什么事情发生呢。期待一下吧！
Let them watch space odyssey
给它们看太空漫游
Then their evolution will be delayed because they’ll be busy trying to understand the ending
那么它们的进化就要停下来了，因为他们会理解不了结尾
Next have them stare at the book animal farm.
然后让它们看动物农场。
It's when the apes start signing about the need for breathing room you should get worried.
当猿猴们开始发出需要呼吸空间的信号的时候，你们就该担心了。
原创翻译：龙腾网 http://www.ltaaa.cn 转载请注明出处
Chimps watching planet of the apes
猩猩看猩球崛起。
人类：“妈耶……他们在计划革命了！”
猩猩：“嘿嘿嘿电视上有猴儿！！！我也是猴儿！！！（往屏幕上扔粑粑
it's time to go back to monke
该返祖成猴儿了。
Don't apes cannot cooperate in large groups like Human's do. At best they kill a few dozen people before being gunned down by cops.
别，猿猴不能像人类那样组成大的团体合作。他们顶多杀几个人类就要被警察开枪打死了。
人类一分，猴儿零分。
Monke has strength but human has advanced military power
猴儿有个体实力，但人类有高级的军事力量。
Nuke that zoo
把那个动物园给核平了。
That’s evolution at work. Please don’t interfere
这是正在进行的进化。请不要打扰。
No. If you return to monke you shall be spared.
不。假如你返祖回猴儿，他们就会饶了你。
Monke unlocking the basic weapons tree
猴儿正在解锁基础武器科技树。
Teach chimps to trade stock and buy crypto and watch them dominate the market.
教他们怎么交易股票和加密货币吧，然后看他们主宰市场。