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Why it is normal for people to stare in asian countries, and not in the west ones?

为什么在亚洲国家人们盯着别人是正常的,而在西方国家却不是?



I visited some family in China a few times in the past couple of years, and each time I’ve noticed that people openly stare at you. Like their heads literally turn 180 degrees just to keep staring at you with wide eyes. I am ethnically Chinese as well, but born and raised in the US. We are taught that staring is extremely rude. I don’t understand why it is normal there. I hate it. It makes me feel violated and like I’m in a zoo. Especially when I see it happen to my family members. It makes me feel like I have to shield them or something. I also notice that men also openly stare at my chest or at other women’s chests and at foreigners who aren’t Asian for an extended period of time. Like until you’re out of their sight. They sometimes even try and take photos. It really bothers me and I cannot comprehend how the majority of the culture just doesn’t see this as scary, rude or even think about the person on the receiving end feels. It soured my trips there and I just can’t get over it. Please help me understand.

在过去的几年里,我陆续拜访了中国的一些家庭,每次我都注意到人们会公开地盯着你看。就像他们的头转180度只是为了睁大眼睛盯着你看。我也是华裔,但在美国出生和长大。我们从小就被教导盯着人看是非常粗鲁的行为。我不明白为什么在中国这样的行为是正常的。我不喜欢被人盯着。这让我觉得被侵犯了,就像在动物园里一样。尤其是当我看到它发生在我的家人身上时。这让我觉得我必须保护他们。我还注意到,男性也会公开地盯着我的胸部或其他女性的胸部看,而且如果对方是非亚裔的外国人时,要盯听长一段时间。直到你离开他们的视线。他们有时甚至试图拍照。这真的让我很困扰,我无法理解 为什么大多数文化中,这样的行为不被看作是可怕的、粗鲁的,也不考虑对方的感受。这让我的旅行变糟了,我就是无法释怀。请帮助我理解一些吧。

Edit: Hello everyone, thank you for your replies and explanations. Many have stated that it is just a cultural difference, and they weren’t taught to see staring as rude or out of line, & most of the time they just do it out of curiosity and have no bad intentions behind it. (Other than the staring/ photos of my chest type of stuff, then they’re just creepy.) I would like to add that I have been to other Asian countries and experienced the same thing, as well as hearing similar stories from my friends when they visit their native countries as well.(Korea/Vietnam/Japan etc.) and that’s why I said “Asian countries” in the title. Though I am aware that it occurs more often in China than the other ones, and I talked about China the most because I spent the most time there. I am sorry if this came off as a stating that everyone in Asia does this. I really did not have that intention. Aaalllsssoooo, additional explanation for why I wanted to know why it was the norm to stare: Whether I’m alone or in the middle of a huge crowd, if someone is staring at me I can feel it. Even if I can’t see them. Like horror movie type of stuff, you know? It makes my hair stand up and immediately puts me on edge. I always thought this feeling was natural/ primal, like it was an evolutionary trait to help alx us of something is hunting us. People where I live ended up utilizing this feeling, and stare to intimidate, threaten, and make you feel like you gotta watch your back. Many people referred to it as “Mad-Dogging” So because of this, I assumed it was just a universal human response to it. So when I encountered a bunch of people staring at me with no shame on several different occasions it was a really big, confusing shock.

大家好,谢谢你们的回复和解释。很多人说这只是文化差异,他们从小没有过这方面的教导,大多数时候他们只是出于好奇而盯着看,这样的行为背后并没有恶意。(除了那些盯着我看/拍我胸部的照片之类的事情之外,还有一些事真的很恐怖。) 我想补充一点,我去过其他亚洲国家,也经历过同样的事情,我的朋友们在参观自己的国家时,也听到过类似的故事。(韩国/越南/日本等)这就是为什么我在标题中说是“亚洲国家”。虽然我知道这种情况在中国比其他国家更常见,而且我谈论的最多的是中国,因为我在中国呆的时间最长。很抱歉这话听起来像是在说亚洲每个人都这么做。我真的没有这个意思。此外,解释一下我为什么想知道盯着别人看是一种常态: 不管我是一个人,还是在一大群人中间,如果有人盯着我看,我都能感觉到。即使我看不见他们。就像恐怖电影之类的? 它让我的头发竖起来,立刻让我感到不安。我一直认为这种感觉是与生俱来的,好像这是一种进化特征,有助于提醒我们某些东西正在追捕我们。在我生活的地方,人们会利用这种感觉,用眼神来恐吓、威胁,让你觉得你得小心点。许多人将它称为“Mad-Dogging”。正因为如此,我认为这只是一个人类的普遍反应。所以,当我在不同的场合遇到一些人毫不避讳地盯着我看时,我感到非常震惊。